


Seasons Came and Changed the Time

by truth_honor_patriotism



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Friendship/Love, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Oral Sex, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-17
Updated: 2014-06-17
Packaged: 2018-02-04 23:42:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1797658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/truth_honor_patriotism/pseuds/truth_honor_patriotism
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky pulled away, face apprehensive. “Was that...okay?”</p><p>Steve was unable to contain a grin. “Yep.”</p><p>“Can I kiss you again?”</p><p>“Please do.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Seasons Came and Changed the Time

Steve closed the door behind him as he followed Bucky into their apartment . “I think that was your best session yet.”

Bucky and Steve had just returned from a therapy session with Sam Wilson, Steve’s friend who specialized in treatment of PTSD. Steve came to every session to support him, and even though Bucky had told him it wasn’t necessary, he could tell (hoped) his friend would rather him be there than not.

Bucky shrugged and his expression remained steely and blank. “Still can’t remember anything important.” He sat on the couch and slouched back into the cushions, staring at the ceiling with furrowed eyebrows.

Steve always felt a twisting stab in his gut, seeing his old friend acting so despondent and hopeless. He crossed the living room and sits next to Bucky, leaving some room between them in case he didn’t want to talk.

“What do you remember, then?”

Bucky avoided his gaze. “Bits--and pieces.”

Steve inched slightly closer to him. “Like… what?” He tried to quiet his pounding heart that involuntarily quickened whenever he was close to Bucky, something he’d noticed even before the serum but thought it was part of his heart condition. Give him space, he’d always tell himself, he doesn’t like you that way. The noble, Cap part of Steve wanted to trample down his emotions to keep them from getting in the way of Bucky’s recovery, but he struggled.

Bucky hmphed and crossed his arms.

“Bucky. I get it if you don’t want to talk, but I’m trying to help you here. I’m your friend, just tell me what you remember-”

Bucky’s silence finally shattered and words came pouring out all at once. “I barely remember anything that happened, but I do remember how I felt about you, all those years never being able to say anything! And now everyone’s expecting me to become this noble and perfect Bucky Barnes who’s gone, and if you didn’t notice me a lifetime ago when I was him, how the hell am I supposed to get you to notice me now that I’m a monster?” Bucky ran his fingers through his long hair, chest heaving, face pulled into a scowl.

Before Steve could tell himself it was a terrible idea, that it would make everyone involved even more confused, he put his hands under Bucky’s chin and kissed him, softly, on the lips.

Bucky pulled away, and looked at him with enough hurt in his eyes to fill a lifetime. “Don’t do things like that just because I want you to. Don’t pretend just for me.”

“Buck-” Steve began, but Bucky sat up, stormed off into his room, and slammed the door, rattling the entire apartment. Steve slammed his fist into the coffee table in frustration. He’d finally, finally, gotten to kiss Bucky--he’d dreamed about it for years--and the punk didn’t even believe it was genuine. He was trying to think of a way to go talk to Bucky without offending him further when he stood up suddenly with an idea, missing the low ceiling by millimeters.

Steve dug in his pockets until he heard the clink of metal, and fished out a chain of army dog tags. Sam had given them to him after therapy, saying that the chain might help trigger some memories.

Steve knocked gently on Bucky’s door and twisted the handle. Bucky was laying on his bed, facing away from him.

“Uh, Sam wanted me to give you these,” he said, holding out the chain.

Bucky slowly sat up and turned to him, feet hanging off the side of the bed. “Thanks.” His teeth were gritted.

Steve placed the dog tags on the nightstand and turned to sit next to Bucky, heart fluttering. _I probably messed it up. He doesn’t want anything to do with me._

Bucky turned his head away, uncomfortable. “So now you know.”

“I don’t suppose you’d believe me if I told you I wasn’t pretending when I kissed you.”

Bucky let out a sigh. “No, I don’t. Maybe you loved him, but I’m not even close to the same person. You can’t keep believing I’m going to go back to the way I was ninety years ago, because that perfect Bucky Barnes you were friends with is dead, pal,” he spat.

“I don’t want you to be someone you’re not. But I know you’re still the same person I’ve always been friends with. I don’t care if you think I should abandon you, because I told you before: I’m with you till the end of the line, and nothing you do will change that.” Steve carefully put his hand on Bucky’s flesh-and-blood shoulder. “You really think I’ve been pretending all those years? I busted my ass trying to keep up with you, even before the serum.”

Bucky finally turned to look at him, with same confused face he’d had when he decided to spare Steve on the helicarrier. “You’re serious?”

Steve’s heart pounded like a kick drum, nervous energy clogging his vocal chords. “I’ve loved you my entire life,” he managed.

This time, Bucky was the one who leaned in and kissed him. Steve tensed up surprise, but the soft pressure of Bucky’s lips and his calloused thumb caressing the side of his face made Steve relax into Bucky's arms.

Bucky pulled away, face apprehensive. “Was that...okay?”

Steve was unable to contain a grin. “Yep.”

“Can I kiss you again?”

“Please do.”

This kiss was far more desperate and hungry, like they were making up for all those years spent not kissing. Steve shifted closer to Bucky, straddling his hips and deepening the kiss.

The brunet made a hungry growl and turned to flip Steve on his back, laying on top of him and grinding into Steve’s erection.

“Buck…” Steve breathed between kisses.

Bucky sat up. “Take off your shirt,” he instructed, while pulling off his own and quickly leaning back down to kiss Steve’s neck, biting and sucking to leave a mark and trailing kisses down the ridges of his abdomen.

“Bucky-” Steve was cut off when Bucky started rubbing through his jeans, making his breath hitch. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

“I’ve wanted to for years,” Bucky said, pulling off Steve’s jeans and boxers.

“I know, I want to too, but we only just kissed- _shit_ , _Buck_ -” Bucky took Steve in his mouth without warning, putting stars in his eyes and making him rip a pillowcase with his grip.

Steve tried again to tell Bucky that this was probably a terrible idea, but the brunet licked up the underside of his length, making Steve shudder and drop the subject. He took Steve in his mouth again, but instead of quickly bobbing back up again, he kept swallowing him, until his nose brushed Steve’s stomach.

Steve murmured Bucky’s name and tugged at his hair, all shaking fingers and shuddering breath. He felt a hot feeling pooling at the bottom of his stomach--

“Bucky--” Steve paused to groan, “--I’m about to--”

Immediately, Bucky pulled away from him. “Not yet.” Bucky's eyes flicked up to meet his gaze. “Do you, ah, have a condom?”

"Buck, we don't have to rush into this if you don't--" Steve protested.

Bucky pushed him gently off the bed. "Go." He smiled softly.

Steve stood up when he remembered Bucky was also rock-hard and probably wanted to get off, too. He went to his room to pull a condom and a bottle of lube out of the nightstand.

He found Bucky exactly where he left him and pulled him up to lean against the wall. Steve pinned him there and pressed his lips to Bucky’s. “Where were we?” Quickly, Steve unbuckled Bucky’s belt and pulled off the rest of his clothes, letting his cock spring out, adding fuel to the fire of desire in his stomach.

Bucky pushed Steve back into the bed and straddled him.

“Which of us, um…” Steve asked uncomfortably. He self-consciously ran his fingers through his hair, aware of his obvious lack of experience.

“I-um, I want to fuck you.” Bucky gently pushed Steve onto his back, lubed up his fingers, and carefully pressed against his entrance. "Ready?"

Steve closed his eyes and nodded as one of Bucky’s slippery flesh-and-blood fingers entered him, moving in and out and making him squirm.

“I’m doing two now.” Bucky did as he said, and slipped in a second finger to join the second, stretching Steve further. Steve’s breath shook, and he let out a low, growly moan. Bucky kept his fingers moving, stimulating him from the inside, and changed the angle, brushing over a spot Steve didn’t know existed. Steve felt a white-hot bolt of pleasure shoot through him.

"Holy shit- Buck-"

Gradually, Bucky added more fingers, until Steve was arching his back and keening, begging.

“ _Bucky come on-_ ” Steve whined.

“I’m getting to that part,” Bucky said, with a small smile. He propped himself up over Steve, and Steve wrapped his legs around Bucky’s waist. Bucky reached down to position himself, then, slowlyslowly, pushed into him.  
Steve closed his eyes and felt every inch of Bucky sliding into him, stretching and filling him like he’d never felt before.

Bucky’s face was contorted with concentration, entering Steve as slowly as possible. He gripped Steve’s hand and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. Steve winced as Bucky stretched him to the point of breaking, hot, and hard, and huge. Finally, Bucky pressed all the way in.

“You good?” Bucky asked.

Steve closed his eyes and nodded, a dazed smile on his face.

Bucky began pulling out again, slightly faster than before, but not fast enough to satisfy Steve.

“Buck.”

Bucky immediately halted mid-thrust. “Huh?”

“I won’t break.”

Bucky started to quicken his pace, slapping his hips against Steve. The initial sharp tang of pain melted into something hot and sweet at the bottom of Steve’s stomach, and the sensation of Bucky’s cock thrusting in and out and in and out combined with the look Bucky has on his face, looking at Steve like he’s precious, his eyes saying the words he was never able to say until now, was just… perfect.

Bucky shifted slightly, and brushed over the spot that he’d touched before. Steve sucked in a breath and made high-pitched keening noises at the back of his throat (which probably sounded stupid, but at the moment, he couldn’t care less) because Bucky touched the spot with every thrust.

" _Fucking hell-"_ Steve groaned, gripping sheets as hard as he could.

"Love it when y'cuss." Bucky closed his eyes, brows still furrowed.

Steve reached up to stroke the side of Bucky’s face, and to pull him down for a long, deep kiss, pulling a growling moan from Bucky, who’d been nearly silent before.

Bucky nestled himself in the crook of Steve’s neck, whispering his name over and over. Every nerve of Steve’s body, every inch of his skin, was tingling with electricity. Steve tangled his fingers in Bucky’s hair and closed his eyes, to focus every bit of his consciousness to how amazing Bucky’s relentless tide felt, to Bucky’s wet, hot breath on his neck, to Bucky’s hands, still squeezing Steve’s.

“Bucky-ohmygod,” Steve gasped. The constant pounding of Bucky against him constantly dripped hot ripples of pleasure like honey, settled in his stomach and was almost too much. “I think I’m close.”

In lieu of response, Bucky nipped at his neck and reached down to slowly stroke Steve’s cock, making Steve arch his back and moan his name.

Bucky leaned in to kiss Steve, and finally, the white-hot feeling in his stomach pushed him over the edge, and Steve could feel himself collapse into himself, Steve could feel Bucky biting his shoulder, Steve could feel Bucky fucking him through his orgasm, and heard Bucky's harsh moan, muffled by the white noise in his ears.  Bucky pulled out of Steve and flopped on his back next to him, Steve smiling back dazedly. He was laying next to someone he loved, and the golden rays of sunset were scattered by the blinds over the floor like drops of light, and everything was beautiful.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, I hope you liked my first fanfic on this site! I plan to do more Steve/Bucky fics in the future, cause they're my babies <3 I'm totally open to suggestions for other stories.
> 
> kudos is very appreciated :D
> 
> **********************************  
> Title is from the song Bang Bang (My Baby Shot Me Down) by Nico Vega. It's a fab song, go listen to it c:


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